Gome of the Week
Quit ripping off Stallone, homeboy.

I think we all remember the original Paradise Alley, and it wasn't written by this jokester. Actually, I have no idea who this guy is, maybe he's a competent author, but that's not the point.

The point is, Biff is pissed and there will be vengeance.

So watch out Kevin Baker, if that is your real name.








This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
You Can't Do That On Television - A sweet walk down memory lane, TV style. Plus, find out whatever happened to former cast member Alanis Morissette!


This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978)

We're coming up on Christmas so we're going to go ahead and try to feature some of our favorite holiday flicks over the next week or so. This one is a true gem.

Sorry for the crappy scan, but it's the best I could do as this is a severe bootleg. It's the Star Wars Holiday Special and boy, is it one of the most bizarre things I have ever seen in my life. It does, at certain points, feature Mark Hamil, Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher, but it also features Bea Arthur and Chewbacca's kid Lumpy. I think Art Carney might be in it too.

On the plus side, there's a pretty sweet animated segment with Boba Fett that's confusing but at least entertaining. But I'll tell ya, if you like extended scenes of Wookies moaning at each other in their homes, this is the holiday film for you.






This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
V/A - Christmas Rap (1987)

This is certainly a holiday classic. It of course includes "Christmas in Hollis" by RUN-DMC, but there are so many other hidden treasures on this baby too. I mean, who can forget Dana Dane?

A great addition to any holiday collection, file it under "Old Skool X-Mas." And then try to figure out just who in the hell the Surf M.C.'s are.





This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
bob - An expert at something.

Origin - Another Dave Huebsche classic that I forgot about for so long. I have no idea where he got it. I think he had a friend named Bob who was really good at stuff or something.

Usage - "Dude, did you see how quick I beat that punk-ass video game?"

"Dude, you kicked some serious ass at that."

"You're damn right I did. Fool, you better recognize."

"Dude, you're a bob."



This Week's Top Ten List
Brad's Top Ten Things I Don't Want for Christmas:

10. A torn rotater cuff
09. A punch in the spine
08. A pet ferret named "Scooter"
07. A phone call before noon
06. rabies
05. scabies
04. A quart of Clam juice
03. Requiem for a Dream on DVD
02. Halle Berry
01. No shit from nobody, partner!