Gome of the Week
KRS-One has done a lot for hip hop. He is also an incredible blowhard.
This Week's Link That's Probably Not That Great
20 Obsessions Even Geekier Than Monty Python - I'm guilty of a few of these.
This Week's Movie You've Probably Never Seen
The Boys of Baraka (2005)
This was a nice little documentary about a group of very poor 5th and 6th graders from Baltimore who win scholarships to a special school in Kenya. It really is a pretty depressing movie but offers some good stuff at the end. Sometimes the kids get so close to ruining the deal for themselves that they will make you angry, but it is hard to blame them for their youthful short-sightedness. I can't think of anything funny to say. So there.
This Week's Record You're Probably Not Listening To
Dr. Louis H. Evans - Love Marriage and God (196?)
You would think people would be looking for encouragement before they get hitched, but all this Jesus freak can offer is stories about how hard the rest of your life is going to be. He clamors on over a backing track of sleep-inducing violin music for what seems like days. Track 1: "Our Wedding Day - Were You Afraid? (Marriage Can Be A Gamble)." Seriously, what a dick. But he says that if you get your prayer on, shit should be cool.
This Week's Hip New Slang Word or Phrase
scrotum coaster - A sweet new name for the taint.
Origin - I'm riffing all over the place.
Usage - "Dude, my coug and I are doing a lot better."
"Dude, that is good news. I knew you guys would work it out."
"Dude, we are bobs at relationship issues. I no longer get frus."
"Dude, that is trump teez."
"Well, I gotta go. I'm meeting my coug and she's going to perform taintalingus on my scrotum coaster."
This Week's Top Ten List
The Top Ten Rejected Hair Dye Colors:
10. Keistered Penny Copper
09. Dirty Whore Blonde
08. Wine Vomit Burgandy
07. Scrotum Coaster Auburn
06. Chili Dog Chestnut
05. Emotionally Retarded Blue
04. Porn Audition Platinum
03. Seagull Shit Silver Mist
02. Santorum Walnut
01. Glazed Skeet Vanilla
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